There are times in my life when I have struggled with frustration. It is when I feel like nothing in my life is going right. The optimal word is feels. Sometimes, I may feel like everything is going wrong, but it is not as bad as my feelings would have me to believe. These moments are depressive and lonely. In these moments, everything seems like it's coming unraveled.
Many times, these moments of frustration come right after I complete a successful journey. It is a time of lull, and I become emotional over everything that happens. My mood is down and my family suffers, because I am less likely to control my temper. Before I started on my personal development journey, I would give into my anger and scream at who ever ticked me off. This included my husband, Brenton, and my children.
This all occurred before I found ways to deal with frustration. Once I understood frustration and learned how to control the frustration, I was happier more often. My life use to stay in frustration mode, but, now, I am more likely to have good days with no frustration. This makes not only me happy, but it creates a peace in my home and makes my family happy.
To deal with frustration, I have created my own steps that help me through frustration. These steps are getting into God's presence, helping someone else, finding purpose, and taking a break. When I apply these steps, it helps me to get through frustrating moments. Each step is vital to getting through frustration and getting in a better mood. The better mood is not only for my sake, but also for everyone who has to live with me.
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Getting into God's Presence
By this we shall come to know (perceive, recognize, and understand) that we are of the Truth, and can reassure (quiet, conciliate, and pacify) our hearts in His presence,
Whenever our hearts in [tormenting] self-accusation make us feel guilty and condemn us [For we are in God's hands.] For He is above and greater than our consciences (our hearts), and He knows (perceives and understands) everything [nothing is hidden from Him].
I John 3:19, 20
To truly get into the presence of God, there are three things we need to do daily. First, we need to praise and worship Him. In praise and worship, we get our spirits lined up with His Spirit. Praise and worship can be done through singing, dancing, writing, and declaring God's wonders. As long as we are singing, dancing, writing, and declaring God's wonder with a humble heart, we will enjoy his presence. A humble heart means we know God gets all the glory and not us.
Next, to get into God's presence, we need to pray. Prayer helps build our relationship with God. This doesn't mean we just talk continuously to God without a break. We find it annoying when others preoccupy the conversation. Conversations are two-sided. If we want to have a conversation with God, we need to pray and meditate on God and His greatness. If you focus on God and not our daily schedule or what is happening in the future, we will experience God's presence.
Finally, the Bible is God's Word and our travel guide through life. It is necessary for us not only to read the Bible, but study and apply the Word of God to our life. Without the Bible, we do not know God's instructions and can become even more frustrated. If we will study thoroughly the Word of God, it will show us how to live victoriously and stop frustration before it pulls us down.
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Helping Someone Else
And we are now writing these things to you so that our joy [in seeing you included] may be full [and your joy may be completed].
I John 1:4
If we feel frustrated with our situation, we need to turn our attention to someone else and help them with a problem. This gets our mind off of our own situation, and it gives us the satisfaction of helping others. There is a reward of joy that helps us through difficult moments. Writing is one of the ways I try to help others.
As we watch others grow and get through problems, it can also give us new ideas to help with our own problems. Recently, I helped a friend with one of her college classes. During this time, I found ways to effectively study for my own graduate class. Now, I am able to get my work done more efficiently and study less with better results.
My mother-n-law, Karen Belknap, always helps others. At first, I didn't understand why she was so eager to help others. Now, I understand that it brings her joy, especially when the other person succeeds. If we help others, their success is accredited to us as well. It is a great feeling to know that you have gone through a problem with someone else, which can help build a relationship with that person. In addition, when you have a problem, they are more eager to help you out. It is a great way to build relationships with others.
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Finding our Purpose
"Efforts and courage are not enough without purpose and direction."
John F. Kennedy
To get our focus away from whatever is frustrating us, we need to work on something that is important to us. As long as our focus is not what is frustrating us, we will get energy from working on finding and fulfilling our purpose. When I am frustrated, I write, work on my Bible Studies, or read one of my favorite books. This helps get me back to feeling better about my life and gets me closer to success.
For example, I am taking a summer graduate class. When I take summer classes, I find it more difficult, because the rest of the family is ready for summer fun. They don't appreciate staying in the house while I study. There are times when I have to stop working on my class work and do something else. Sometimes, especially during these summer classes, I get out of the house with my family and have fun. Other times, I just switch my focus to something I like to do, such as working on my blog. Well, that is what I'm doing right now. My assignment is due this next Monday, so I am trying to get my paper done. Unfortunately, I was getting frustrated and had to switch to my blog, which is important to me and makes me feel fulfilled and successful.
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Taking a Break
"Take rest; a field that has rested gives a beautiful crop."
Ovid
Of course, there are times when we can't even work on our purpose. These are the times that we need to stop working and start resting. Many times, we become frustrated due to exhaustion, so we need to lie down and take a nap or do something that doesn't take as much energy. After we rest, most likely, we are able to get a lot more work done. Sometimes, pushing ourselves to complete a project when we are exhausted is counterintuitive.
At these times, I try to take a nap, which is hard when you have children. They love to burst through the door when I have just fallen asleep. This is when I decide to either take them to grandma's house or lock my door. No, this does not always work, but this is when I find other relaxing activities like reading a book or watching my favorite shows. After a long day, I love to curl up next to my husband, Brenton, or one of my children and watch a movie. Many times, I fall asleep and get the rest I want as the kids are preoccupied by the movie.
Challenge for the Week
This week we need to figure out what is frustrating us. If we are frustrated, our lives are not as productive. When we work on finding ways to eliminate our frustration before it even begins, we can live each day with more joy. It also means that, even if we are not frustrated at any time this week, we need to work on preparing ourselves by practicing God's presence, helping other people, finding our purpose, and eliminating exhaustion even before we get to the point of frustration. Practice acting as if you cannot fail, because God has a plan for your life and He will see it through to completion.
"All that is necessary to break the spell of inertia and frustration is this: Act as if it were impossible to fail."
Dorothea Brande